Have it ever happened with you that after listening to a long (or short for this matter) story you find yourself questioning what the fuss was all about? Ever found yourself unable to comprehend the lecture, or the important points of a meeting? Do you feel people have stopped talking to you because you have no idea after a conversation what they actually said?
With our fast-paced, fast-forwarded lifestyles nowadays we have stopped listening to others. We have just started hearing and we hear only to put in a word of what our thoughts are about the matter (and hearing helps to know when there is silence and we have a chance to blurt out!).
But how can you really listen and stop hearing? It’s very easy. Just needs a little bit of practice. Here are some tips:
- Pay undivided attention. Next time when someone speaks to you, pay undivided attention to the speaker. Remove your cell phone, laptops, TV remote or anything you find interesting to fiddle with and just listen with full concentration and undivided attention.
- Seek to understand. Focus on what the person is saying with the intention of understanding and not for the purpose of replying only.
- Don’t think about yourself. Focus only on the person and what he is saying. Do not think about yourself, your problems, your tasks and all the stuff that’s running through your mind. You’ll improve your listening a whole lit.
- Improve your body language. Lean a bit towards the speaker. Nod in affirmation at times. Provide your feedback only when asked(see next tip). Do not fidget, fiddle, slouch or in any way show that you are bored. Express appropriate emotions through your facial expressions.
- You are not the judge. Until and unless you are judging between two people or are asked to do so, DO NOT judge. It’s not your job. You have to listen. So whenever you are asked for your feedback, after listening to someone, be polite and honest. Avoid criticism. If you find something that might sound harsh to the person addressed to, say it in a polite manner. Watch your language.
These are some tips to help you rejuvenate your listening experience and be the person everyone wants to talk to. 🙂
Note: Your precious feedback is always welcomed. So don’t forget to put your share of comments.